Thursday, September 27, 2012

Grace Of Letting Go

Have you ever experienced being the second moon who wants to embrace the sun? Yeah, it might sound so cliche. We always have this kind of concept in any drama. We might be the ones commenting against the second moon who makes the love story of a couple complicated. But let me tell you this: it is so different when you are the one playing the third party. You will understand why the second moon tries to shine brighter than the first moon, especially when the constellations try to deceive her.

I feel like the second moon now...not a star, but turning into a black hole.

In my brokenness, I wrote this song:

The Grace of Letting Go

I made a mistake
I asked her
Insensitive
She didn't know her words
are knives slicing my heart

I made a mistake
Dreamed of him
Wrong, I believed
He didn't know his moves
are signs fooling my heart

Chorus:

Should I surf over the waves,
while watching love birds
singing their song?
Should I stir up
what should be still?

How long should I
endure the pain?
Oh how long should I wait?
How hard it is for me
to be here all alone

(Repeat all)

I cried all night
Thought I'll be alright
Can't with my own might
Where's the grace of moving on?
Where's the grace of letting go?

(Repeat chorus)

You know what? I cried hard just last night. Thank God, I have a friend who God used to comfort me. Like what He said last year, I should not let any burden stop me from doing the things He asked me to do. I consider leaving. Yet, what good it can bring me? Leaving is not the answer.

If there are messages I want to listen to now, those are the "When God Doesn't Make Sense" messages of Ptr. Ernie Aragon. I don't know what's going on and why should I experience all of these. Yet, I know that answers are going to be revealed someday.

My friend who comforted me today said that God already knows what will happen in 2016. I am still here in 2012. Everything seems vague and abstract to me now, yet time will come that I will just laugh on these issues I am facing right now.


By Guest Writer Nikka Lynn